The Myth of the Myth of the Satanic Community

The idea of a Satanic community is only a “myth” to those who lack emotional intelligence and common sense. Those Satanists who can rise above their elitist myopia long enough to make nice and gain the friendship of others are truly masters of one of life’s most important skills: not being a fucking douchebag.

In fact, so many possibilities open up for the non-douchebags of the world–personal, professional, and romantic possibilities–that a self-aware person would puzzle over what anyone could ever hope to gain from acting like a snobby little shit in the first place.

As we Satanists search for the best ideas, separating the wheat from the chaff, let us spare the misanthropic malcontents among us none of the ridicule that they rightfully deserve. For in their devaluation of others, they also devalue themselves, leaving themselves only to hold up hollow accomplishments as “proof” of their supposed superiority. What they lack in their ability to touch others’ hearts and minds, they try make up for with… stuff. They trade the ability to inspire for the ability to acquire, and they are all the poorer for doing so.

A wise person knows that the ability to see value in others, and to help others increase their value, will inevitably benefit him or her to a greater extent than his or her singular efforts ever could. There is a difference between self-interest and selfishness, though a fool will always conflate the two. One who is motivated by self-interest would naturally not want to be treated like an asshole, and one of the best ways to accomplish that feat is to not act like one, to not hold oneself in such high esteem that he or she cannot be surprised by or learn something new from other people of any walk of life.

Some have posited that Satanists would not get along with one another in a community setting, because of each Satanist’s fierce individuality. However, individuality is not a factor in how well one can get along with others. The ability to get along with others is determined by one’s level of maturity and his or her emotional intelligence. Humility, the asset that an immature person views as a liability, also plays a major factor in gaining likability. Maturity, emotional intelligence, and humility are not exclusive to fierce individuality.

Those who hail snobbery as a virtue are a truly sad lot, but worse are the people who allow themselves to be devalued to such a point that they would want to gain the snobs’ approval. Though an “elitist” might say that he or she is only maintaining some kind of standard against mediocrity, the individual who does not feel beholden to the arbitrary standards of others is the one who maintains his or her worth. That person never spends a night secretly hoping that he or she has kissed the requisite amount of ass to be considered one of the cool kids.

This is not to say that Satanists should not have standards for the other people that they interact with. We have no respect for foolishness. But it would be wise to hold maturity and likability in higher esteem than one’s ability to have a lot of stuff, or project his or her superiority onto others.

Hail emotionally intelligent, grown-ass men and women! Hail Satan!

John Buer

John Buer is the first ordained priest of the United Aspects of Satan and the community organizer for Atheistic Satanists of the Bible Belt.